Mental pain ranks pretty high up there as one of the worst things ever. Feeling down, terrible, invisible, ignored, misunderstood, heartbroken or powerless is literally excruciating. It weighs down on you in the worst way. And it bleeds into your daily life – interactions with other people, getting shit done on a day to do, hell, even eating, becomes such a task that you end up wanting to with draw from it all.
The last time I had severe mental pain, I gained like 50 pounds and didn’t see anyone I loved for several months on end. It was atrocious. But real.
Anways, what I’ve learned is that when you’re in pain – especially when it comes to dealing with another person or other people – one way to address relieve yourself is to look at the situation from two truths.
Your truth – what you believe
and THE truth – what actually is
Sometimes, what you believe to be true is not actually true. Like in real life – it’s not a fact. Oftentimes, our beliefs make us sick or cause pain but if we take a second to question our beliefs and see if our beliefs are actually FACT or if they are just things we made up in our head, we might find some healing for the pain.
Here’s an example –
You’re trying to lose weight. You’ve been working hard for a few days, eating clean(ish), busting your butt on the treadmill, drinking apple cider vinegar (or whatever other special potion you found on the internet) etc. It’s been a few days and you aren’t seeing the dramatic change in your body that you were sure you would see by now.
And because you don’t see the change, you start getting discouraged. You start feeling bad like, man – I’m working hard, doing what I’m supposed to do. Why am I not looking skinnier? Why does it feel like nothing’s happening?
Man, I suck. This is a waste of time.
So you say those things to yourself, you think those thoughts. You cause yourself mental pain by being down on yourself. You start to question your efforts and consequently your self worth.
The truth, you decide, is that you aren’t losing weight. That’s YOUR truth.
But is it THE TRUTH? Is that a real statement that can be backed up with evidence?
The answer is, you don’t know.
And why don’t you know? Because you didn’t weigh yourself.
You haven’t gotten on the scale to see if you are ACTUALLY any smaller than when you first started.
So you realize that you believe you’re not losing weight but you can’t say that’s the truth for sure because you haven’t gotten on a machine to find out.
So you get on the scale and you see something crazy. When you started the work, you were at 206. And now, almost a week later, you are at 203.
You’ve lost 3 whole pounds. Three!!
And then suddenly, a smile cracks through the pain. In fact, the pain kind of subsides because YOUR Truth wasn’t THE Truth. Now that you know THE Truth, you stand up a little straighter, encourage yourself and take back all the crazy talk from before because THE truth of the matter is that regardless of how you feel (skinny or not), you ACTUALLY lost weight. 3 lbs.
That’s the thing about thoughts and beliefs and our truths. If we don’t question them, if we don’t attempt to explore them and maybe prove them wrong, we suffer. We beat ourselves up unnecessarily. We say mean things to ourselves, we hold ourselves back, we get down on ourselves and start to nurture a darkness that isn’t natural. Or even true.
In everything, take Your Truth and test it to find THE Truth. They aren’t always the same thing.